Headcoverings and Hairscaping
If you're a headcovering female of the Mennonite sort, and if you find the headcovering practice burdensome or loathsome, or even if you're just in search of vanity--I mean variety, I have some suggestions for you.
1. Minimize. Limit the headcovering's opacity, shrink its size, and take care that it covers a minimal area of real estate.
2. Play peekaboo. Locate the hair bun very low in the aft position, and make sure it peeks out underneath the headcovering.
3. Experiment with the fore. In the vast exposed area here, novel hair parting, hair twists, and curving and twining swoops and braids all hold promise. This practice is to be commended for its economy; no hardscaping--I mean hardware--is needed. A dangling hank of hair on either side of the face will frame an intricate creation nicely. In brief, make your hair do something interesting while it's hanging out at the fore.
4. Add ornamentation. A sequined bobby pin. A slender plastic hair hoop. A wide, colorful headband or a dainty lacey one. So many possibilities.
5. Use sparkly fabric. Plain fabric wouldn't look right on a sculpted, ornamented, selectively revealed silky-textured "landscape." So, make it all look better by racheting up the sparkle factor in the headcovering itself.
6. Pray about it. Stand by yourself, thanking the Lord that you are not as women of the world who are proud, vain, and haughty. Stay strong in the face of pressure to the contrary, and maintain your modest, humble, simplicity-loving demeanor. You know, after all, what not everyone knows: what's in the heart is what counts. Hairscaping doesn't tell you anything.
1. Minimize. Limit the headcovering's opacity, shrink its size, and take care that it covers a minimal area of real estate.
2. Play peekaboo. Locate the hair bun very low in the aft position, and make sure it peeks out underneath the headcovering.
3. Experiment with the fore. In the vast exposed area here, novel hair parting, hair twists, and curving and twining swoops and braids all hold promise. This practice is to be commended for its economy; no hardscaping--I mean hardware--is needed. A dangling hank of hair on either side of the face will frame an intricate creation nicely. In brief, make your hair do something interesting while it's hanging out at the fore.
4. Add ornamentation. A sequined bobby pin. A slender plastic hair hoop. A wide, colorful headband or a dainty lacey one. So many possibilities.
5. Use sparkly fabric. Plain fabric wouldn't look right on a sculpted, ornamented, selectively revealed silky-textured "landscape." So, make it all look better by racheting up the sparkle factor in the headcovering itself.
6. Pray about it. Stand by yourself, thanking the Lord that you are not as women of the world who are proud, vain, and haughty. Stay strong in the face of pressure to the contrary, and maintain your modest, humble, simplicity-loving demeanor. You know, after all, what not everyone knows: what's in the heart is what counts. Hairscaping doesn't tell you anything.
posted by Mrs. I (Miriam Iwashige) at
5:00 PM
15 Comments:
your comments are much needed in our circles today. It is a privilege to be protected by the angels. We need to be passing on the scripture. Modest, humble, simple.... being in the world but not of it is a challenge. I love point # 6! I appreciate your insight, and perspective. DH
By
Anonymous, at 3/27/2014
DH, thanks for the affirmation.
By
Mrs. I (Miriam Iwashige), at 3/27/2014
An interesting read, but it makes me sad. Is it also that way in Kansas? :) #6 is quite sobering. I often wonder what God thinks. Maybe you should write a piece about scarves (neck-scarves) next.
By
Frieda Yoder, at 3/28/2014
I howled at the irony. And then, I sobered. The way we do our hair and wear our headcovering is revealing. No pun intended.
- Tina
By
Anonymous, at 3/28/2014
You and I have the same concerns, but perhaps prefer different approaches to the problem. It is true that what's in the heart is what counts, otherwise we wouldn't be seeing this kind of behavior. Change will only come as Jesus heals the pain and brings enabling grace to live for His approval only. Battering the outward issues is rarely effective in the long run especially when dealing with teenagers who are still trying to find their way in their adult world.
By
Anonymous, at 3/29/2014
To Anonymous--I'm not sure that "pain" is the correct identifier for the most common primary motivation for the behavior I describe. I'm also not convinced that what I (or perhaps others) have done is correctly identified as "battering the issues."
I confess to being quite weary of what often looks to me like regarding outward things as being off-limits for discussion or challenge. I assume it's clear already that I understand that directly observable results are usually not the "sum" of the realities.
Although I am adding many mental caveats to this next statement, I'm becoming more convinced than I used to be that changing outward behavior can often result in changing attitudes and desires of the heart. James K. A. Smith develops this idea very convincingly in some of his books and lectures. Desiring the Kingdom is one of his books.
One more note unrelated to the content of any comments: I find it easy to feel warmth in my heart toward DH or Tina, whom I can't
connect at the moment to anyone within my circle of acquaintances, "Anonymous" isn't quite the same. If Anonymous is someone I know, I have a history with that person that will motivate me to treat the relationship gently--if I can "see" them in my head. If it's someone I don't know and they are willing to be identified, I know this is someone with whom I'm beginning to build a relationship, and I will treat it respectfully also.
When I've opened myself publicly to evaluation/criticism, I really, really appreciate it when anyone who weighs in on this forum does the same. Granted, my preference here will not always carry the day, and I really love comments of all kinds, so I hope I'm not scaring off commenters. What I'm saying is that if you will kindly identify yourself, even minimally, I will be far more inclined to respond warmly. I'm not sure that's how it should be, but that's how it is.
By
Mrs. I (Miriam Iwashige), at 3/29/2014
One illustration of what I referred to in the next-to-last paragraph above is this: Anonymous referred to the need for people's need for healing from pain. I know that to be true, of course--that people need healing from pain. On the face of it, however, the comment looks like some of what I've encountered before and didn't much like--unwillingness to deal with what's in your face because of obsessing over what all might be there and out of sight. I am quite willing to stand my truth-telling motivation up next to that anonymous person's pain-sensing motivation, and, given the choice, I will choose my truth-telling motivation.
On the other hand, if I knew, for example, that Anonymous has invested deeply and personally in helping others find healing, it would add a great deal of credibility to the comment, and I would recognize it simply as the perspective of one who has seen many aspects of life through that lens, and I could easily accept the possibility that if I had seen what that person has seen, I might feel what they feel.
Does that make sense?
By
Mrs. I (Miriam Iwashige), at 3/29/2014
oops...I can see where that comment felt like a hit and run. I didn't mean it that way. Just didn't quite understand this commenting format....anonymous was the only choice that let me post and then I hit post without realizing that I had not signed it. I surely felt no need not to identify myself. I see now, though that I tried to say in one little paragraph what would have best been talked through in a conversation. Sorry. Jo
By
Anonymous, at 3/30/2014
Well, that's a relief--my friend, and someone I know has no sneaky intentions. BTW, since I moderate all comments, if something ever goes wrong with the first comment, send a second one (which I will likely read first), and tell me what you want changed in the comment before it's published. I think I can change it, although I've never tried to do so.
By
Mrs. I (Miriam Iwashige), at 3/30/2014
Or how about this: #6. Stand by yourself and thank God that you are not like these proud vain Mennonite women and girls who do hairscaping. Thank him that you maintain your modest, humble hairstyle with a large covering or veil in place and that you are more right with God than those who do hairscaping.
I think it is unfair to judge every woman's heart by what you see in their hairstyles, whether fancy or plain. Besides Jesus said that what comes out of the mouth reveals what is in the heart.
But I think there is a deeper issue that has not been addressed. What if the hairscaping is not a sign of vanity but perhaps a sign that they do not really want to wear a head covering at all? Why are women and girls forced to wear it instead of letting it be their own free choice. You may protest that it isn't forced on anyone but I beg to differ. It is ingrained in them from little on up that they must do this if they want to obey God and be right with him. They belong to a culture, churches and families that require the wearing of the head covering, it is in the rules and standards of their churches. Parents and husbands would not allow them to take it off. So unless they want to go the painful and agonizing route of leaving their churches, abandoning the practice altogether and facing the judgment and censure of family and friends,maybe this is the only way they know how to cope within their restrictions. Why not remove the rule altogether and and allow it to be a choice. Then you might find out what is really in the heart and it may surprise you.
By
Ella, at 4/02/2014
I think it's time for an "in other words" post to clarify some things in this post. I've often told my composition class students that it's always risky to write ironically because it's very difficult to do it well. I should perhaps have heeded my own cautions. This has become a much bigger deal on this site than it ever was in my own mind when I wrote the post. Just so you know, I was smiling, not frowning or grimacing or clenching my teeth when I wrote it.
By
Mrs. I (Miriam Iwashige), at 4/02/2014
Well, I don't have anything super spiritual to add to this discussion, but I just howled with laughter when I read this fine bit of irony. I think I hear your kind, honest, truth-loving heart coming through, and I like that!
-Thy niece
By
Hannah, at 4/03/2014
Thanks, Hannah. I love being understood, or at least being given the benefit of any doubts.
By
Mrs. I (Miriam Iwashige), at 4/03/2014
There is a difference between loving concern or making fun. Judgement of size and kind of head covering, or judgement of any kind is perhaps more serious then the perceived transgression of not having a sufficiently sized and placed head covering. We don't all interpret the Bible the same but God alone can judge the heart. I doubt seriously that reading this would encourage compliance on anyone's part.
By
Anonymous, at 4/09/2014
To Anonymous--
You do understand irony--right? Compliance to what? That implies an absolute, objective, and perhaps universally standard practice, which I don't actually subscribe to. Is your comment judgement-free?
By
Mrs. I (Miriam Iwashige), at 4/09/2014
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