Under My Thumb
Grant loaned me Li'l Red (his mini-truck) since my minivan is in the shop. I drove it earlier today and got along fine, and I drove it to Arlington church to hear the last Pilgrim program tonight. Things went downhill afterward--flat terrain notwithstanding.
Li'l Red has been upstaged by what I call Big Red--the truck that Jared provided for Grant. (Sorry I can't provide any more details than its color, but I think it must be a pretty cool truck.) It's a perk, I suppose, for working for someone with a vehicle dealership as well as a farm. That leaves Grant and Clarissa with three vehicles between them and they're letting me use one of them. Big Red towed my minivan to Fairview yesterday, so he's good for something other than looks.
Some things about Li'l Red do not really rhyme with my persona. I'm sure I'm a very poor representative for RealTree or BowTech, but the front and back windshield each contain one of these hunter-type decals. A long aerial waves from the top of the cab. I got some strange looks earlier today in this little machine.
Tonight after the program when I started to leave I got Li'l Red started just fine, clutching and shifting as needed, and headed into the driveway to leave the church parking lot. What was going to be a quick flick of the headlight switch, however, did not materialize. I couldn't locate it. I ground to a halt, and several vehicles behind me were forced to do the same while I fumbled. Definitely a proud moment. One little horizontal wheel thingie labeled "lights" did a great job of brightening and dimming the interior lights, but brought no illumination to the area outside and in front of the vehicle. I waved people around me and then, in the dark, pulled a little farther off to the side.
I tried again some of the things I had tried earlier. Pull back on the big knob. It made a humming/scratchy/buzzing sound but produced no light. Wrong again. Push on some likely-looking black horizontal things below the horizontal wheel. The right side of the horizontal switches sort of disappeared into the dashboard, but still no lights.
My imagination churned along and I wondered if this vehicle perhaps did not have functional lights, and no one remembered to inform me. It would be easy, after all, for Grant and Clarissa to leave it parked at home after dark. If that were the case, Li'l Red would have to spend the night in the church parking light. As for me, well, fortunately, my rarely-used cell phone was charged and available. I called Grant, who did not answer.
I called Hiromi who had opted to stay home. He called Grant, who answered. Grant called me. Those two black horizontal switches were for the headlights. On the left side, I needed to sort of pull them out toward the driver's side door. "They're a little wiggly, but they always come on," Grant said. "One is for the parking lights and the other for the headlights." I did as he said, pushing/pulling on both switches and the lights came on. I thanked him and drove out.
I headed toward the after-party at Steve and Evelyn's. Then I began to wonder what my chances were of getting those lights to cooperate again. Besides, it was getting late by then. Probably the snacks had been served and I would arrive on the scene in an untimely manner. If I went, I would need to leave soon again anyway because I could not bear starting out this busy week tired from staying up too late. By the time I got to Partridge Road, I had convinced myself that going straight home was the wise thing to do.
After I turned off, I remembered that my parking lights were probably still on. Aren't those usually off when the headlights are on? I'd better turn those off. I pushed only one of those switches, and complete darkness prevailed. Oh no. I clutched and slowed and pushed/pulled desperately on both switches again, and the lights sometimes went on and always stayed off unless I kept my thumb firmly depressing those switches. If Marvin and Lois or Linda were looking out as I passed their houses, they must have wondered what was wrong with that vehicle or its driver. And that's how I drove home--three miles, my thumb hard on the switches. This was a bit of a trick while I shifted. There was no extra hand for the steering wheel at those times.
After I parked it here at home, I committed myself to getting this figured out--once and for all. I pushed and pulled just like I thought I had done in the church driveway when I got the lights to come on. No luck. It was a short-lived commitment. I gathered my things and headed for the house.
Ah. So good to be home. If I ever need those lights again, I'll tackle them in the daylight. No. Wait. I won't need them in the daylight. Well. Whatever. I'm good for now.
I often thank God for my minivan. I really hope it doesn't have a terminal illness. Li'l Red is good for something, but he and I don't seem to understand each other very well.
Li'l Red has been upstaged by what I call Big Red--the truck that Jared provided for Grant. (Sorry I can't provide any more details than its color, but I think it must be a pretty cool truck.) It's a perk, I suppose, for working for someone with a vehicle dealership as well as a farm. That leaves Grant and Clarissa with three vehicles between them and they're letting me use one of them. Big Red towed my minivan to Fairview yesterday, so he's good for something other than looks.
Some things about Li'l Red do not really rhyme with my persona. I'm sure I'm a very poor representative for RealTree or BowTech, but the front and back windshield each contain one of these hunter-type decals. A long aerial waves from the top of the cab. I got some strange looks earlier today in this little machine.
Tonight after the program when I started to leave I got Li'l Red started just fine, clutching and shifting as needed, and headed into the driveway to leave the church parking lot. What was going to be a quick flick of the headlight switch, however, did not materialize. I couldn't locate it. I ground to a halt, and several vehicles behind me were forced to do the same while I fumbled. Definitely a proud moment. One little horizontal wheel thingie labeled "lights" did a great job of brightening and dimming the interior lights, but brought no illumination to the area outside and in front of the vehicle. I waved people around me and then, in the dark, pulled a little farther off to the side.
I tried again some of the things I had tried earlier. Pull back on the big knob. It made a humming/scratchy/buzzing sound but produced no light. Wrong again. Push on some likely-looking black horizontal things below the horizontal wheel. The right side of the horizontal switches sort of disappeared into the dashboard, but still no lights.
My imagination churned along and I wondered if this vehicle perhaps did not have functional lights, and no one remembered to inform me. It would be easy, after all, for Grant and Clarissa to leave it parked at home after dark. If that were the case, Li'l Red would have to spend the night in the church parking light. As for me, well, fortunately, my rarely-used cell phone was charged and available. I called Grant, who did not answer.
I called Hiromi who had opted to stay home. He called Grant, who answered. Grant called me. Those two black horizontal switches were for the headlights. On the left side, I needed to sort of pull them out toward the driver's side door. "They're a little wiggly, but they always come on," Grant said. "One is for the parking lights and the other for the headlights." I did as he said, pushing/pulling on both switches and the lights came on. I thanked him and drove out.
I headed toward the after-party at Steve and Evelyn's. Then I began to wonder what my chances were of getting those lights to cooperate again. Besides, it was getting late by then. Probably the snacks had been served and I would arrive on the scene in an untimely manner. If I went, I would need to leave soon again anyway because I could not bear starting out this busy week tired from staying up too late. By the time I got to Partridge Road, I had convinced myself that going straight home was the wise thing to do.
After I turned off, I remembered that my parking lights were probably still on. Aren't those usually off when the headlights are on? I'd better turn those off. I pushed only one of those switches, and complete darkness prevailed. Oh no. I clutched and slowed and pushed/pulled desperately on both switches again, and the lights sometimes went on and always stayed off unless I kept my thumb firmly depressing those switches. If Marvin and Lois or Linda were looking out as I passed their houses, they must have wondered what was wrong with that vehicle or its driver. And that's how I drove home--three miles, my thumb hard on the switches. This was a bit of a trick while I shifted. There was no extra hand for the steering wheel at those times.
After I parked it here at home, I committed myself to getting this figured out--once and for all. I pushed and pulled just like I thought I had done in the church driveway when I got the lights to come on. No luck. It was a short-lived commitment. I gathered my things and headed for the house.
Ah. So good to be home. If I ever need those lights again, I'll tackle them in the daylight. No. Wait. I won't need them in the daylight. Well. Whatever. I'm good for now.
I often thank God for my minivan. I really hope it doesn't have a terminal illness. Li'l Red is good for something, but he and I don't seem to understand each other very well.
posted by Mrs. I (Miriam Iwashige) at
10:03 PM
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